A Haiku
Alternate Fire
You make me feel so naughty
I right-click for joy
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2007
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April
(36)
- Random 2 a.m. Musings
- New Rule
- Windfish's Slumber
- Toshiro Ono made a good manga
- Correlation Does Not Imply Causation
- We Would Like To Play
- I played 5 hours of a game today. Guess which one.
- Through The Fire And The Flames
- Brawl Contestants
- Contestable Content
- R-R-R-Remix
- SPACE MADNESS
- A Question Of Balance
- Samus Aran Is Hot
- A Haiku
- Does this make any sense to anyone else?
- Blast Processing
- A Problem Of Quality
- NEW STREET FI-WHAT!?
- Substance Of Liberty
- STOP SUCKING, GAMES
- Gamespite
- Brawl Contestants Contest
- Look at the bump mapping on that girl!
- Fun With Fractions
- Time to get some Gametap
- Cradle, wtf?
- And Now For Something Completely Different
- The One Where I Should Be Asleep
- Cheap Death
- A Puzzling Development
- Surrender or die in obscurity-Ramza
- Puzzling Problems
- A Steaming Pile Of Source Code
- La of La of La
- Vayne/Cid '08
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April
(36)
103 comments:
I zoom in, zoom out
My sniper scope is my friend
Surgical, they say
Running in circles
Double-you, A, S, and D
An FPS dream
I crouch jump so high
They'll never see me up here
On top of this door
Switch to the Deagle
For ultimate victory
My pocket shotgun
Gravity Weapon
Flinging objects at my foes
A toilet murder
Why capture that flag?
An existential problem
It will just respawn...
I crouch hump the dead
To shame fallen enemies
But never in games
Two pistols in hand
Dual-wielding is the key
Now for great justice
A high grenade jump
I can never do it right
I just end up dead
Press f1 to vote
Change the map, kick the jackass
In real life, I wish
dkauffman haikus
He is not as good as me
I haiku harder
A laptop assault
Deploy as sentry turret
My enemies fall
Rmcdougall is
A huge n00b I will pwn him
in the face so hard
Jigglypuff floating
Menace to my noble Roy
Again, with the Rest
A rush of zerglings
My supply depot in flames
I concede GG
Joanna Dark is hot
It is indisputable
Former blog title
The back of the box
"New RPG elements"
I've heard that before
I HATE HATE HATE HATE
HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE
HATE HATE HATE HATE YOU
Of forged steel
Nemesis to wooden crates
But Freeman's best friend
Waiting for stim packs
My marines and medics twitch
Hear, "research complete"
A moving mountain
Wander is hard to control
Fall from a great height
Snake,are you alright
What is going on? Answer
me now Snake Snake? SNAAAAKE!
Steel blades of chaos
Ares! I am the god of war!
Disappointing fight
Aoi counters
Good throws for massive damage
Pai runs away now
Midnight Carnival
How can a gear be guilty
Great fighting game
I had an affair
With your mom so sorry we
Cannot be together
Party getting crazy
Looks like one hell of party
Dante's single mind
Six hundred dollars
Too much for MGS4
Sorry Kojima
Cave Story rocks socks
Pixel is my hero all day
2D forever
Barefoot in the park
Even elevator music
is cool in Eva
Stick to games you n00b
DKaufman is a huge n00b
No Eva haikus
Haikus are very
Addictive and fun I should
Be doing real work
Limit of two guns
and rechargable shields
Halo gets copied
A movie license
It's my first clue of the suck
ET: worst ever?
Beam sword from behind
Blue light makes me run faster
Such a bad idea
I throw my grenade
But this physics engine sucks
You are so lucky
Ten dozens of stars
Yoshi breaks my triple jump
Damn that dinosaur
Dragoons and inclines
A portrait of endless pain
Damnit, up the ramp!
Rounding the corner
my pinky pushes Shift hard
I am so sneaky
At the baron's feet
Black death is quickly humbled
Who brought paladins?
Generic med kit
You make me feel new again
No matter the wound
Swords, Bows, and magic
I am the master of all
Fable: so easy
The dog is your friend
Fable 2 is ambitious.
Might totally suck
"I pwned you, n00bzor"
"You forgot to screen capture?
It didn't happen"
Select the barracks
Produce the willing marines
Where do they come from?
I jump and kick
Then I sweep low, at your shins
But you always block
Lucca and Robo
Getting busy in Epoch
Hot sweat and oil mix
Leaving Chrono's house
When mom wishes you farewell,
Ask for allowance.
Midna and Navi
A fight I would pay to see
Midna in the fourth
A real life forest
A mushroom sits on a log
Why doesn't it glide?
Super speed is good
I am invincible as
long as I have rings
This is the Freeman
The Combine's reckoning has
come. Vortigaunts rule
Meryl's frequency?
Look at the back of the case
Breaking the fourth wall
We are not tools of
The government or anyone
Else. Fight for beliefs
Space pirates are bad
Samus Aran equals love
Roll into a ball
Enter the matrix
On second thought, please do not
It is really bad
Alyx Vance kicks ass
Kneeing undead in the crouch
Zombines are punny
The Gear Sol Badguy
Badass smoldering loner
Totally gay for Ky?
Final Fantasy
Crystals Chocobos Moogles
Seven overrated
So many Megamen
Multiple games every year
My brother plays all
MMO's eat lives
Eight million World of Warcraft
Mmmmm tasty, they say
The Naked Gamer
Truly nude? Fan service. Please
look forward to it
The Advent Children
Best movie based on a game? Unfortunately
Castlevania
Whipping for fun and profit
An evil vacuum
Wakka Wakka Wak
Wakka Wakka Wakka Wak
Wak Pac Man fever
I slalom through trees
and drift along icy cliffs
This is Exciting
I charge the finish
leaving clouds of dust for you
to drive through and win
Life as a grenade
Spawn in a corner, not seen
I wish I was Shields
||editors note||
Last line: "was" or "were"?
A barrel to shield
Gravity gun holds it still
Damnit, it explodes
So close to the goal
I just need to land softly
Monkey Ball bounces
To be or not to be.
Assassin's Creed.
Might never come
(It's a haiku in the original sign language, but it loses/gains sylables in translation)
Bodies disappear
Or else the door would get stuck
Stupid Soviets
I'm a Zelda boss
Seek the KEY to my demise
Elsewhere in dungeon
I can look straight down
Oh God, where have my feet gone?
FPS nightmare
I'm a Zelda boss
Don't worry yourself too much
I might kill myself
Blocks click together
Flatland snowing masonry
Complete rows vanish
RPG Backpack
I carry twenty-four swords
or twenty-four coins.
A ladder beckons
Only way to get below
I fall on my face
How did you get here?
You have ruined the story
Goddamn speedrunner
You circle strafe
I stand still, and still pwn you
I crack myself up
Jump through the ceiling
Hover on a plywood board
Of course, a speedrun
I hate flash grenades
My teammates use them freely
Bright white hurts my eyes
Final Fantasy
New engine brings CGI
Just go play Seven
Volumetric clouds
Ooh, pretty colors
Brave one, do not hope
to complete this noble quest
without continues
He slashes my leg,
his sword dripping with my blood
His casting improves
It is a nice day
and if you never advance,
it need not end
It respawns again
I kill it seven more times
Out of ammo.
Italian plumber!
He just fixes the faucet
Disillusioning.
Anonymous posts
Reveal yourself or suffer
Game reference here
X Command Mission
Stealing ten's battle system
Axl is a girl
Simon's eight way whip
Never to be seen again
I am sad panda
Pikmin are much fun
They are quite tasty I hear
Real time strategy
Geo-mod too early
Play a bunch of communists
The game kinda sucks
Spike from graceful arc
To swirling oblivion
Sound of a chicken
I shout objection
The power of attorney
Edgeworth feels the fear
My feet feel the bass
AWP is the greatest
N00bs are pwnzored
Agro? Agro! arg
Agro? Agro! Agro? AGRO! arg!
Wating for my horse
Gotta catch'em all
Hours of my life pokemon
The sound of money
Poetry of games
Entertaining use of time
One hundred comments
When I killed the boss,
he loaded one of his saves
They know the secret
Fwak, respawn, repeat
Five deaths, ya enough grenades
boom flying warthog
walljump to walljump
i'm at the last boss so fast
hope there is no ban
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